GMAT Essays (AWA)

This AWA is from my last week's Manhattan CAT test. Please review ans score.

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"Monetary compensation is the most powerful stimulus for improving employee productivity."

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the position stated above. Support your viewpoint using reasons and examples from your own experience, observations, or reading.

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YOUR RESPONSE:
A company's success is directly proportional to employees' productivity. An employee's productivity is directly proportional to job satisfaction. The job satisfaction depends on many attributes like work culture, job responsiblity, compenesation, roles and duties. Monetary compensation is an important factor but it is not the most powerful stimulus for improving employee productivity.

An employee's productivity will depend on 2 broad categories - financial environment and social environment inside the company. Financial environment describes the monetary benifits an employee would recieve for his/her day to day activities in the company. Higher the performance of an employee higher the benifits. But in an ideal situation the performance is also dependent on the 2nd category as well, which is the social environment. The social environment describes the work culture, subordinate-manager relationships, roles and responsibilities in a team etc. In a healthy work environment the social environment will provide great pschological advantage to perform better. Take for instance, Google Inc., the employees in the organisation are hand picked and Google maintains a good balance of both financial and social environments. A company which has a sound financial environment but a poor social environment will for sure attracts lot of new employees but when the employee finds out that the social environment is not comfortable, the performance will decrease inspite of high monetary compensation and attrition rate of the compay will increase over a period of time.

Both the financial and social environment should be in balance and both together is vital in acting as a stimulus in increasing employee productivity.

Too short, it may help to come up with an organization with intro, body and conclusion paras with clear and strong points for each of them. Also, proof read to get rid of grammatical errors including errors in construction.